Tīng bù dǒng
Ting bu dong. I don’t understand.
I don’t know how many times I’ve used, or heard this phrase since we’ve been in China. It was the third thing I learned how to say, right after hello, Ni Hao (knee-how), and thank you, Xiexie (sheshay). My coworkers taught me ting bu dong a week after we moved here. Standing at the bar, they said, almost off hand “oh btw, this is one you’ll want to know.” And boy were they right. I’ve not only said the phrase, I’ve heard it muttered at me, spoken then followed up with a translator coming out, it’s also been yelled at me while riding in a didi (the Chinese equivalent of an uber in America).
To say I don’t understand has not always been an easy phrase for me. I’ve always been a seeker of knowledge and understanding has typically come easily to me. But that was in America and I am not in America. I’m in China with my husband, Rhys. I'm teaching English and History to 4th graders and he’s living his best life eating dim sum everyday, learning Mandarin and how to better understand this new place we call home.
We’ve been here a month now, and the two words I’d use to describe the last month would be, constant learning. Everyday we are learning something new. From “Can I drink the tap water?” Answer is no, you can’t, boil it first or get bottled water, to “how exactly do I use a squat pan toilet and where IS the toilet paper?” The answer, very carefully and it’s outside the stall, bring it in with you. This month has been centered around constant learning. Everything we “just knew” how to do in America went out the window when our plane touched down in Guangzhou. There was no longer any innate knowledge of place, language, or customs- we knew nothing, and seeking to understand became the first priority.
Rhys and I landed in Guangzhou, China on July 29th, 2024 to begin a three year long adventure of living and teaching abroad. I’m a teacher and I had accepted a job with BASIS International School in February of 2024. Rhys is a poker dealer and when I asked if he wanted to accept the challenge of moving to a new place and country, he said yes. So, we got married on March 5th, 2024 and began the long, arduous process of immigration.
The process to get a work and spousal visa took from March until literally the day before we left, July 27th. And believe me, I was sweating with anxiety as the days grew shorter and our visas were still not in hand. We were scheduled to be on a plane on July 28th, we had sold our house, packed the three bedrooms and two baths into an 8x12 POD, and the VISAs were STILL not back from the agent yet. I was wrecked with anxiety. It wasn’t until the Fedex carrier dropped off our passports complete with two fresh Chinese VISAs that I felt “ready to go.” Literally less than 24 hours before we left.
And so on July 28th my mom and Blair drove us to PDX, we boarded a plane bound for China and haven’t looked back. We knew a few things before we left. We knew someone would meet us at the airport in Guangzhou, we knew I had a job waiting and would start the day after we arrived and we knew we had a furnished apartment waiting for us. That’s what we knew. Other than that we were flying blind. Looking back there were so many things we didn’t know, so many things there was no way for us to know until we experienced them. Trial by fire and boy were we lit aflame.
